so that wasnt chicken after all
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
So. Much. Porn.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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