i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
