I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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