doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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