We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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