My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Damn victory sex feels great
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
