My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
