I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Randomize
