Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
