they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
