I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
