In the future we'll all be gay
I'm drive I can fine osifer
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
