I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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