the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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