mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize