You're completely useless in the revolution.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
