hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
