Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Randomize
