worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
The feeling are messing with the penis
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Randomize