ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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