i just had sex bonerless
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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