There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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