the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
We were destined to go to rehab together
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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