she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
