You're so nebulous sometimes
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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