It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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