his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
