I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
