Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
