omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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