no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?