you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises