dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I have fence marks all over my body
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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