I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
