Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize