Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
