Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
