Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Randomize
