what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
