what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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