He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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