she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
