I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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