Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize