I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Randomize