"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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