im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
