I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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