But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
