My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
