Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
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