if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
My Higher Power is John Stamos
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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