It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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